WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a stunning turn of progressive policy gymnastics, the Democratic National Committee has reversed its earlier decision…
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LDS Church’s Ensign Fund Goes All-In with $100 Billion to Defend Lego Joseph Smith (@Mormonger) in IP Lawsuit Brought by The LEGO Group
In a stunning pivot from quiet wealth management to plastic prophet protection, the LDS Church’s $100 billion Ensign Peak fund…
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Jazz Tank Job Tanks: With Fifth Pick and Flagg Long Gone, Utah Settles on 7-Foot White Guy Who Sets Great Screens
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — After a season of “strategic player development” (read: losing on purpose), the Utah Jazz secured…
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Pope Elected on Fourth Ballot, LDS Church Puzzled by Effectiveness of Opposing Votes in Ballots 1–3
VATICAN CITY — After three rounds of sacred debate, whispered prayers, and highly ceremonial side-eye, the Catholic Church successfully elected…
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🚨 BREAKING 🚨: LDS Church Shifts ‘Chosen Generation’ Mantle from Millennials to Gen Alpha; Gen Z Fumes Over Being Skipped, Declares Divine Favor Is ‘Mid’
In a stunning generational pivot, the LDS Church has officially reassigned the long-coveted title of “Chosen Generation” from Millennials to…
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LDS Church News: 1,800 African Converts Tithe Gladly, Yet to Pick a Side in the Eternal Gross vs. Net Debate
KAMPALA, UGANDA — In what Church leaders are calling a “historic milestone of faith,” over 1,800 new converts across several…
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President Russell M. Nelson Invites All to Read The Book of Mormon; LDS Dads Everywhere, Having Read the Title Page, Ask, “Now What?”
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — In a global devotional this week, President Russell M. Nelson invited members of The Church…
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LDS Church Confirms BYU Defensive Line, Not Three Nephites, Changed Your Grandma’s Tire
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints released a rare clarification today addressing decades…
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